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I Almost Spent $300 on a Coat I Didn't Need (Here's How I Stopped the Spiral)
Published 1/29/26
Advice
My finger was hovering over "Complete Purchase."
$300 for a winter coat I definitely needed because it's two degrees outside and mine are all... what? Not good enough? Not the right aesthetic? Not the one I just saw on someone's Instagram?
I glanced at my coat rack by the door.
Seven coats. SEVEN. Staring back at me like "are you serious right now?"
And that's when it hit me: I don't have a coat problem. I have a social media problem.
The 30-Second Spiral From Content to Inadequate
Here's how fast it happens:
You open your phone to check the time (and maybe to distract yourself from being bored.) Thirty seconds later, you've scrolled past:
- Someone's designer bag collection
- Someone's brand new car
- Someone's kitchen that's bigger than your entire apartment
- Someone's "capsule wardrobe" that costs more than your rent
You put your phone down and suddenly your whole life feels...smaller. Less shiny. Not enough.
The wild part? Five minutes ago, you were completely fine. Happy, even. But after half a scroll session, the internet has convinced you that everything you have is inadequate and you need to upgrade immediately.
I know this cycle intimately. Because I fall into it constantly.
The Moment I Realized I Already Had Everything I Needed
I didn't buy the coat.
Instead, I put my phone down (face down, on purpose) and looked around my actual apartment.
Not through a camera. Not thinking about how it would look posted. Just...looked.
And here's what I saw:
My favorite mug on the coffee table. The blanket my mom crocheted. Photos on the wall from my wedding, from trips with friends, from random days that turned into the best days. My dog asleep in a patch of winter sunlight. My son's toys scattered everywhere (annoying but also proof of a life being lived).
I looked at my calendar: birthday parties, dinners with friends, my sister coming to visit next week.
I looked at my bookshelf, where I keep this fat stack of photo books, one from each month of my son's first year.
And I realized: I'm not missing anything. The internet just wants me to think I am.
7 Ways to Remember You Already Have Enough (When The Internet Says You Don't)
If you're caught in the same spiral, here's what actually helps me break it:
1. The "5 Things I Already Own" Rule
Before you buy anything over $50, do this:
Open your notes app and list 5 things you already own that serve the same purpose.
Want a $300 coat? List the 5 coats on your rack. Eyeing new jeans? List what's already in your closet. Lusting after another water bottle because this one is cuter? You know where I'm going with this.
You don't have to talk yourself out of buying it. Just acknowledge what you already have first.
Sometimes that's enough to break the spell. Sometimes you still buy it, and that's okay too. But at least you're making the choice consciously instead of from a place of manufactured lack.
2. Unfollow Accounts That Make You Mentally Redecorate Your Life
Not accounts that inspire you. Accounts that make you feel inadequate.
There's a difference.
Inspiration feels like: "Oh, that's a cool idea I might try!" Inadequacy feels like: "Why doesn't my life look like that? What's wrong with me?"
If someone's content consistently makes you look around your apartment and feel disappointed, or makes you think "I need to buy X to be happy," you don't owe them your follow.
Your mental health > staying on trend.
Mute them. Unfollow them. Protect your peace. They'll be fine. You'll be better.
3. Keep Your Real Memories Visible (Not Just on Your Phone)
I have those photo books I mentioned, one from each month of my son's first year. And when I flip through them, here's what I see:
Not viral moments. Not Instagram-worthy trips.
Just...life:
- Walking him outside for the first time when spring finally came and cherry blossoms were everywhere
- A terrible selfie of me, rosacea and all, with him sleeping on my chest
- Sitting barefoot in my parents' driveway teaching him how to play with chalk
- My sister swinging him in a hammock
These aren't grand. They're not Paris hot chocolate café moments. They're just regular, beautiful, ordinary life.
But here's why they matter: When your memories are printed and visible, on your walls, your coffee table, in books you actually flip through, they remind you what your life contains. Not what it's missing.
Your phone makes you scroll past your own memories to look at everyone else's life. Physical photos interrupt that pattern.
4. Name the Feeling Out Loud (It Breaks the Trance)
When you catch yourself spiraling, literally say it out loud:
"I'm comparing myself to someone on the internet and feeling like I don't have enough."
Sounds silly. Works surprisingly well.
Why? Because naming the feeling takes you out of the emotional reaction and into observation mode. You're not in the spiral anymore—you're watching yourself be in the spiral. That distance is enough to break the spell.
Then you can ask: "Do I actually need this? Or does the internet just want me to think I do?"
5. Remember That Grand Trips Aren't the Only Way to Make Memories
Don't get me wrong, I'm the biggest wannabe world traveler. If I won the lottery, I'd be gone. There would be signs.
But I'm learning this: Memories don't have to be expensive or Instagrammable to be meaningful.
The time you laughed so hard at dinner you cried. The Saturday morning you stayed in bed an extra hour. The walk around your boring neighborhood where you actually noticed the sky.
Those count. Those matter. Those are your life.
You don't need to book a trip to feel like you're living. You don't need to book a trip to feel like you're living. You just need to notice the life you're already in.
6. Take a 24-Hour Break From the Apps (Just to Reset)
Delete TikTok, Instagram, whatever your poison is. Just for one day.
See what it feels like to not be constantly fed images of other people's highlight reels. See if you feel different about your coat rack, your apartment, your regular life.
You probably will. Because when you're not being told what to want every 30 seconds, you remember what you actually want.
And a lot of times? It's not more stuff. It's more presence. More connection. More of what you already have.
7. Practice Gratitude Without Making It Cringe
I'm not going to tell you to start a gratitude journal with fancy prompts and perfect handwriting.
But I am going to suggest this: When you catch yourself in "I don't have enough" mode, name three things out loud. Right now. Wherever you are.
"I'm grateful my heat works." "I'm grateful for this coffee." "I'm grateful my body woke up today."
That's it. No posting. No performing. No aesthetic photos with journaling and a latte.
Just noticing that your life, right now, exactly as it is, contains good things.
What I Want You to Know
Your life doesn't need to look like anyone else's to be good.
Your apartment doesn't need marble counters. Your closet doesn't need to be full of new things. Your calendar doesn't need international trips.
You can have a beautiful, full, meaningful life with:
- Thrifted clothes
- A small kitchen
- A modest apartment
- Regular weekends
- Ordinary moments
The internet will try to convince you otherwise every single day. It will show you shinier versions of life and make you feel like yours doesn't measure up.
But here's the truth: You already have it all. You're already doing it all.
The people who love you don't care about your countertops. The memories that matter aren't the ones that look good in photos, they're the ones that made you feel something real.
The Bottom Line: Your Real Life Is Happening Off-Screen
So before you buy the coat, book the trip, upgrade the thing, or spiral into "why doesn't my life look like that", take a breath.
Put your phone down. Look around your actual life.
The people in it. The moments you're living. The memories you're making in small, ordinary, beautiful ways.
That's the stuff. That's what you'll remember. That's what matters.
The internet just doesn't want you to realize that. Because if you did, you'd stop scrolling. You'd stop buying. You'd stop comparing.
And you'd start living in the life you already have.
Which, by the way? Is already enough.