Jennifer Anderson of Kids Eat In Color Gives Her Best Tips For Feeding Picky Eaters
What is a “safe food”?
So we started about three and a half years ago. I had this feeling for a while that I was not the only mom struggling with feeding my three-year-old. And maybe, just maybe, I could help another mother out! So, in January of 2017, I started the @kidseatincolor Instagram account, posting mediocre pictures of my kids, the preschool lunches I made in the kitchen and showing off a few tips and tricks I learned along the way.
I just want to assure parents that if you read all the books, took all the courses and followed all the advice, and your child still gets picky with food, it's normal and not your fault! You cannot 100% prevent picky eating. Some things are just beyond your control. That being said, I do have an insider tip parents should keep in mind. There's a developmental shift that happens around one or two where a child can become afraid of new things—they can get clingy and have separation anxiety. That can display in picky eating, as well, if you notice a fear of new foods. Be patient.
If your child is indicating that they want more food during a meal, give them more food. Don’t force them to finish what is on their plate. The more practice your child gets in serving up their own plate, the more they will learn how much food they can eat. Some kids just have trouble learning their own hunger and fullness cues.
When your child is verbal, you can start teaching them. One way is to give them a glass of water and have them drink it until full and you can tell them that the feeling they have in their tummy is “full”. Typically, kids will eat until they feel full and not beyond. If you have a child who regularly overeats to the point of throwing up, then a visit to the pediatrician is in order.
A “safe food” is a food that they usually like—because we all know that toddler tastes can change from day to day—and it’s a food they can eat as much as they want! That can be fruit, rice, toast, milk, or something else.
My guess is they’re probably a really strong, creative child and they don’t want you telling them what to eat. But there are some things that you can do to help them expand their diet over time. It may not be easy, but patience and consistency really do help. Start with the basics of having a meal and snack schedule. Put a variety of foods on the table and see what they gravitate towards.
Three words: Let it go! Too often we're getting super stressed about who's eating what and why and where and how come they aren’t eating and did they get enough! So. Many. Worries. Instead, we need to remember our job is to provide a balanced meal and a proper mealtime with at least one safe food. It is then our child's job to eat. I know it’s easier said than done, but practice makes perfect. Put your energy into cooking food you enjoy and not giving attention to the negative stuff. Kids will respond to your energy.
I usually think of two things: shape and hardness. Anything round and smooth, like a grape, a hotdog chunk, even a Clementine wedge can create a choking hazard. A good way to judge high risk choking foods is that anything bigger than your pinky finger is something that a child could choke on. Also, you don't want to be serving chunks of hard things. If you want to serve an apple to a toddler who's just learned to eat, shred it up or soften it in the microwave. Making sure it has a little ‘squish’ to it will help lessen the choking hazard.
I think they're extremely convenient! If you are on the go and your child needs some quick nurishment, those are great. The challenge they create when you habitually use them at home is your child will be missing out on all of the developmental and the sensory exposure they would get from those real foods. For example: a mango and kale pouch—what does it predominantly taste like? Mango. They are missing out on the taste and texture of the kale, as well as the texture of the mango. So they’re great for convenience, but not in place of real foods.
The fastest way to eliminate food waste is to stop putting food on your child’s plate. Give them more control over their food! I love serving dinner family-style. “Family-style” is a dining method where you put all of the components of a meal onto the table and allow everyone at the table to serve themselves. Make sure you include at least one safe food as well as any new vegetables or proteins that you’d like, and then let your kids dish up what they want!
I don’t think any food should be off limits. Because guess what? As your kids get older, they will have more agency. And then before you know it, they have hidden in the neighbor’s pantry, inhaling all the fruit snacks they can eat! But limiting certain things, like sugar or soda, isn’t a bad idea. If you want to give your kids cookies for a snack one day, that can take the allure out of those more enticing treats. And then the next day, when presented with cookies or fruit, they might pick the fruit instead!
Listen to the full MomForce Podcast episode for more of Jennifer’s food wisdom, and check out her website Kids Eat In Color for extra picky eater tips and tricks. You can also follow her on Instagram and Pinterest.
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